Chapter 2 and 3 of "Sex has a Pricetag" start out by saying that God invented sex, made it to be good, so He surely must know the best context for sex in this life. There's no way around it, the only context that He says is right, and the only way that it will be blessed, is within the context of marriage. If you've said "I do", go for it, if not, don't.
Lots of teens think they are saving their virginity by doing everything but intercourse. In the book we saw that by medical definition, any genital contact is sex, so all that messin around qualifies! And it's a great way to catch a disease. The best example in the book is this- can you imagine a married couple saying "Hey honey, when I was on my business trip I had oral sex with this lady, but I knew you wouldn't mind since it's not really sex". No.
We verified that most everyone knows someone who has friends with benefits, with multiple partners, among Christian crowds and in youth groups. And you know people considering it. So how can you help them steer away from that decision? Pray for them, give them this book to read, talk to them about STDs, be the encouragement they might need, tell them you're not doing it so not everyone is, be an example of something different, someone standing up for a better way.
Sex has lost its value in our society, it has a "so what", "what's the big deal" attitude...everyone's doing it... lots may be doing it, but not everyone is. And the ones who are living this way are not experiencing sex at its best, the way that God blesses it in marriage. God is not trying to ruin your fun, but trying to help you have the best later. FWB and casual sex brings with it alot of destruction and emotional problems too, which we'll cover later...
The subject of pornography came up and how hard it must be for guys especially to live in this culture trying to remain pure. Pornography destroys many marriages. If someone "programs" themself to need pornography, they often can't even have a normal sex life later in marriage. I encourage you to start praying for your future husbands now!!
2 Cor 7:1 is a great scripture to pray for yourselves and for them. "Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God." Ask God that your husband will purify himself from everything that would contaminate his body and spirit, and that he would pursue holiness out of reverence for God.
Since the "sexual revolution" in the 60's, sex has become a lot freer, and moral guidelines are almost gone. But with that we have escalated depression and an epidemic of STDs. I believe there is a better way, that God knew all along because He created the guidelines we're meant to follow! Health professionals are even now questioning our current culture of casual sex, because it has turned into a health epidemic. Only when we follow God's ways are we blessed and at peace. He wants to help us get back there...
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